The Evolution of a Disliked Pursuit

I recently had the privilege of chatting with several of you, amazing readers, about starting a new creative pursuit. I heard a lot of uncertainty: “Do I know enough about this topic?” “Am I really interested in it or will I get bored quickly?” “Will I ever be good at it?” “Will anyone want to buy it?” “I’m interested in many things, how do I know this is ‘it’?”

To illustrate why you should just start something that is a tiny bit interesting, even if you have all these doubts and questions, let me describe the evolution of this blog.

My Entire Life Pre-2018

I hate writing and I’m convinced I suck at it. Business school essays = my worst nightmare; my admittance was clearly a fluke.

2018-2019

I start journaling because every self-help book on the planet says I should.
It’s helpful so I do it often. I’m still convinced I can’t write and don’t want to write.

2020

I’m learning a lot about personal development, but some ideas overlap and some are contradictory. I need to sort out my learnings and thoughts. Since I’m used to doing that via journaling, I start writing… and I'm interested enough to keep doing it, no outcome in mind.
My favorite podcaster announces a writing class. I like her and seem to be writing more, so I sign up. 
I spend at least 15 minutes a day writing for the duration of the class. I end up with many short essays, which I call “musings”.
I get carried away by the enthusiasm of my classmates, all of whom are writing a novel or a screenplay. Maybe I can write a book of musings and drawings.
I try to decide which drawing fits which piece of writing. I feel like I’m forcing it. I give up.

2021

I write every time I feel the urge to. Still not sure what to do with all this. Some of it is more meaningful than random musings.

2022

I have about 40 posts that require serious editing but seem… not random.
I ask a couple of people I trust to read them and tell me if there’s something there. They think there is.
I decide to publish this blog. Three posts a week, after a lifetime of thinking I can’t write, hate writing and will never voluntarily write anything.

…

This little example didn’t end up with me riding into the sunset with a billion dollars, but the feedback I receive from you, dear readers, about how my writing helps you means more to me than many supposedly bigger successes in my career. And the story isn’t over yet. I have ideas…

It’s not always a straight line. You can’t tell where you’ll end up when you begin. You don’t start because you know you’ll be “good at it” or love it forever or be on the cover of Forbes. You start because starting gives you a chance to learn and evolve, while continuing to think about it… doesn’t. 

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