The Most Important Question to Ask Yourself in the New Year

As I think about my goals for 2023, the most important question I ask myself isn't "what do I want to accomplish?". It's "who do I want to be?"

If you’re like most people, including yours truly, many of your New Year’s resolutions fail because you want to achieve things or change habits, but you don't change who you are in your own mind: Your identity stays the same. Therefore you eventually resort back to the person you've always been and still are—the one who didn't do what it takes to achieve the things you want.  

To change, you have to adopt a different identity:
To maintain your "workouts three times a week" resolution past February, you have to become the kind of person who has a nonnegotiable workout practice.
To get a job you won't hate in six months, you have to become the kind of person who is willing to ask for what they want and not give up until they get it.
To grow my art practice, I have to become the kind of person who has the courage to put her work out there even if she hears crickets or gets rejected multiple times.

When it's time to take action on your resolutions, you remind yourself of the kind of person you choose to be and do what that person would do to achieve their goals. 

Who are you going to be in the new year?

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If you're looking for a good end-of-year look-back exercise, Jay Shetty recorded a podcast episode to help people reflect on 2021, and it's just as applicable for 2022 (Apple, Spotify). Jay is a media personality and life coach who made a name for himself teaching personal development after a three-year stint as a monk in an ashram in India.

If you don’t want to listen to the full episode you can read the nine questions he asks in the show notes. 

Happy New Year!

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